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Notices and offering; Contributed by Mark Milliken

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Contributor: Mark Milliken - view my work

Notices and offering

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A monologue originally written for a service on the topic of giving, specifically money.

Performed from the front, this monologue is best when not introduced as a sketch but simply performed as if it is part of the notices. Hopefully everyone in a congregation will realise that this is in fact a sketch, if they don't you may have cause for concern.

Notices and Offering

Well there’s a lot of stuff going on in the church at the moment so we’re just gonna bring you
up to speed on everything.

First off, plans have now been completed for the repair of the Church roof. The final quote has come in at £6000 for all the necessary work. In order to meet this cost we will be holding a coffee morning on Tuesday. That will be here at Church, between 10:30 and 11:30.

Fellowship is great isn’t it Therefore everybody is invited to an informal get to together at Derek’s house on Wednesday night where there will be ample refreshments and we will be trying out his new plasma screen, complete with THX certified surround sound with a mega movie marathon. Great opportunity for fellowship there.

As you will all be aware the duty of paying the ministers salary falls to the Church. In order to ensure that this is budgeted for on an ongoing basis we will be allocating the money received via gift aid for this purpose. However it should be noted that at this time the minister is the
only person who is gift aiding his offering and this is resulting in an unforeseen budgetary loop of a diminishing nature.

Continues...

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